When it comes to figuring out where she stands in the relationship, there are so many tips already out there, it really becomes a non-issue. Figuring out your own place in the relationship, however, can seem infinitely more baffling. We are nothing if not incredibly good at lying to ourselves, after all. How often do we convince ourselves that we can put something off, don’t need to do it, or can get by on less than we actually need? It is because of our ability to fool ourselves that we look for things like reviews of fling dating sites for Birmingham in the first place: we tend to trust someone else’s impressions over our own when it comes to the unfamiliar.
Instead of Looking Forward to Hooking Up, You Look Forward to Seeing Her
One of the most critical differences between having a fling and being involved with someone is the level of attachment involved. That is why, if we hook up for a fling, and suddenly find ourselves constantly just wanting to spend time with her, the chances that we are getting more involved than we intended is pretty high. The fact of the matter is that once you start violating the original expectations of any relationship, it is time to reevaluate where you stand, why, and what either of you want or can do about it. In the case of becoming too attached to someone who was supposed to be a fling, start with what it is you want to spend time doing with her.
This does not only apply to how much sex you want to have with her, either. The primary purpose of this tactic is to note change. While in most cases having a fling means having casual sex with someone you find attractive for the moment, it does not mean only this. In fact, many flings tend to be more romantic than sexual in nature. It is all about branching out and trying something different, often times without extracting yourself from a primary relationship you are already in the midst of. That is why learning to understand the difference between hooking up and hanging out is important. In the case of flings, while hooking up can easily mean just showing up for sex, it can also mean meeting somewhere for a date or a night on the town. The difference that we are looking for, then, is that instead of looking forward to the experience you are going to share, your anticipation is all about seeing her specifically.
You Contact Her More than She Contacts You
Continuing along those lines, if you are not equally getting in touch with one another and you find yourself frequently vying for her attention, there is a pretty good chance you are getting attached. In fact, this is a very common thing to happen, particularly in flings since they generally have a romantic nature at least along with a sexual one. That is to say, you usually become involved on more than one level and that lends itself to becoming attached quicker than just meeting up for sex. No amount of reading reviews of fling dating sites will ever be able to tell you what your real interest in fling dating is: that is something you will have to figure out on your own. The quicker you do this, however, the more likely you will be able to tell when you start too become too attached to her, the situation, or both. The level and type of communication is usually a very good way to judge this.
This is especially true if you change how you started getting in contact. For example, if you originally had a lot of correspondence through email, even after the first meeting, and now find yourself constantly texting her, even just on a whim, chances are you are getting attached. Likewise, if Birmingham suddenly feels like too large of a place for a decent fling and you respond by calling her more frequently or chatting with her online just to keep up with where she is and what she is doing, you are definitely more attached than you realize. Now, if she is doing this to you instead, it is probably the other way around. The primary thing to pay attention to is not so much how much you talk with one another, but who is making the initial contact. If it is you more times than not, there is a pretty good chance you are more attached than you meant to be.
Sticking Around Longer During Morning Afters
Another clue that you are more attached than is typical for flings is when you start lingering around in your morning after. While it is gentlemanly to stick around after a good lay and compliment her in the morning, and certainly charming if you make an easy breakfast for the both of you, there is a line between suave playboy and sticking around just because you want to spend more time with her. That line can be a little elusive, so you really need to pay attention to it. If, however, you think you might fall into one of the previous categories, comparing it to how you act the morning after can actually help to clear things up.
For example, if you find yourself making sure you have certain foods stocked for her preferred breakfast instead of just making whatever you happen to have around, there is a pretty good chance you are more attached than you meant to be. Hooking up in your pad, too, if you were previously meeting up elsewhere shows a level of comfort that might indicate more trust and companionship than you may have previously realized. The long and short of it is, just like finding reviews of fling dating sites got you to a service worth using, so too will reviewing your own actions shed some light on your level of attachment. Make the effort and ask for outside opinions if you have a friend or two willing to listen if you just aren’t that sure what something means, if anything at all. Typically, if you have discussed about it beforehand, then it won’t be a big issue in the morning after. However, you must take your casual encounters carefully. Visit http://flingsitesguide.co.uk/top-websites/ to read fling dating website reviews and learn some tips for dealing with morning after scenarios.
Forgoing Other Relationships
Lastly, and most glaringly obvious, is when you start preferring her presence over other people. We don’t mean just wanting to spend time with her to get away from an ex, or to keep from hanging out after work, either. We mean that if you usually hang out with your friend four or five times a week, and after hooking up end up reducing that to once or twice, you may want to consider your motivations. While a new fling can take up a good deal of your time, once you get farther along, it feels more like just another event that happens and your schedule adjusts. If, however, you find yourself a decent way into the relationship and still preferring her presence to most others, there is a pretty good chance you are already more attached than you intended to be. This is because you are anticipating her instead of the date or hookup itself. Being aware of your habits helps learn the motivations and through that you will always find out everything you need to know.